Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Boca Raton Fights Back Condom Kiosks

A hot dog stand is a hot dog stand anywhere but in the middle of Boca Raton.

In this city where the median family income is $90,000, 90% of the population is white, million dollar plus estate homes line the well manicured, perfectly planned city, and residents cringe at the mere thought of anything breaking that perfect Prada image.

Residents are now furiously battling the owner of a hot dog stand in the area of Palmetto Park Road and A1A, insisting the $2.50 Nathan hotdogs being sold within view of the neighboring million condominiums such as the neighboring Meridian are not only offensive, but pose a danger in that who knows what they might bring next.

The ruffled well-feathered Boca residents are protesting the obvious violation of a"community appearance protocol" which just might turn the prestigious Boca area into a Coney Island, God forbid. Concerns voiced by residents include fears that venders may hawk condoms, hats, and even suntan oils from the open air kiosk carts. Boca etiquette prohibits the ingestion of vulgar hot dogs and screwing within city limits, which explains why they shop so much.

This has turned into a real battle considering the City Manager's office just signed a contract with the owner of the cart, who in turn invested $10,000 of his hard earned hot dog money into this venture. Stay tuned for the final outcome in this hot dog war where the wearied wealthy Bocans attempt to crush out the poor, hardworking vendor under their Ferragamo heels.

All this state where you need a bullet proof vest just to mow the lawn. It is true what they say, the rich are very different...and at times, equally ridiculous.

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