Saturday, November 24, 2007

Fake Driver's License Franchises, Palm Beach Style

Recently floated here from Haiti? Moved down from New York with a suspended license? On the run from Georgia police for marrying your 11 year old cousin? Not problema papi. We have just the solution for you and yours.

This thanks to Homeland Security which since 911 ironically makes it extra difficult for illegal immigrants and felons to get driver's licenses, giving birth to a new kind of fronts and on line sites that allow just about anyone to get an international driver's license. The real thing is indistinguishable from the bogus, even to traffic cops. The police have no way to check out foreign driver's licenses and can only go through the International Criminal Police Organization. So they rely on pictures of licenses from different countries distributed (I swear to God) by beer companies. God bless coronas once again for their contribution to Florida society.

But back to the advice column... if you are dodging INS or the FBI, don't stress yourself out by standing in line at the local DMV where they might expect you to take a sign test at the very least. Here's all you do....

Head for Palm Beach county where certain Delray Beach stores are selling the "international driver's licenses". If you missed the $99 "international driver's license" sale, advertised in Spanish just across the street from the Lake Worth Police Department, don't worry. You can bet a certain Check Cashing Stop will be have their annual holiday driver's license discount sale.

Federal Trade Commission reports a fake license sells for $65 to $350 and despite their best efforts, remain available in hometown storefronts or on the Internet. Check out the International Automobile Driver's Center
which offers "international driving documents" including a photo, and $75 for next-day delivery, according to the application. Tallahassee could learn from this.

Almost as easy as terrorists getting their pilot's license in Florida... and you don't even have to pass a road test.

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