Monday, November 19, 2007

Christ of The Abyss

Disneyworld is politely requesting visitors to refrain from scattering the remains of their dearly departed within the waters of Pirates of the Caribbean. Ditto for your late Uncle Harry playing one last round of golf at the club unless you plan a midnight memorial service with the utmost stealth. As cremations increase, so does that human spark of creativity in planning unique and unforgettable grand finale moments. In case you were curious, although Florida law does not specifically prohibit the scattering of dear Aunt Jane in your own rose garden, to do it anywhere else requires specific permission or it becomes a misdemeanor violation. Scattering over public lands or fresh water is not usually permitted, and may require specific permits. Certainly there are logistics in scattering your husband's ashes, such as not to be so insensitive as to leave telltale mounds, and to remember to turn away from the wind so as to not get a mouthful of Grandma. National parks may require permits, and each has their own criteria for allowing ashes to be dispersed.

But be encouraged,
if you are a Gator fan you can climb the stairway to heaven directly to the Swamp. For some time University of Florida has allowed die hard (no pun intended) fans and alumni to spend all of their eternity in Ben Hill Griffin Stadium. What's next...Gator Nation orange and blue urns? Who knows they probably already sell them in the book store.

But for those who want a truly unique farewell, there is always the eternal call of the sea. Maritime funeral services provide for a number of memorial arrangements to include biodegradable urns, wreaths, eulogies. One of the most favorite sites for disposal of ashes in Florida, is the Christ of the Abyss located 6 miles east-northeast of Key Largo, Florida. It is a 9 foot statue of Jesus Christ standing on the bottom in approximately 25 feet of water in John Pennecamp State Park, the only underwater park in the world.

Now why on earth would scuba divers want to jump in that?

But it gets better. The next time you lay on South Beach sands you may want to think about this eerie scenario before you take a carefree topless dip in the waves, or go deep sea fishing.

I would be referring to "Direct Sea Burial option for Uncremated Remains", offered by the Navy as well as certain private maritime funeral businesses. Coffins
must be made of metal, extra sand weighted to go down feet first so as to sink rapidly and permanently. Where exactly do they do this? They dispose three miles out from land, in water no less than 600 feet deep, the Gulf Stream...a fisherman's trolling grounds. Yet I am expected to recycle to keep our water safe and clean?

Not to mention this information should lead us all to have certain dismaying second thoughts when strolling the beach to see what the tide has brought in....for that unusual shell just might belong to somebody's mother.

Sigh, somehow Mahi Mahi for dinner just does not sound quite so enticing tonight.


MissBettytheMom said...

Great blog. I will be in your area in the spring so will check out some spots you mention. You can see my blog at with stories of my son's battle with cancer as he goes off on various adventures in various places in the world. Missbettythemom.

Gringo Louco said...

They must be lucky ashes!!! For we have the best football team in the world!